For some couples, separating money and kids during a divorce can be difficult. It can be tempting for some parents to try to use the children as leverage when it comes to discussions about finances. One woman said that she got some great advice when she was divorcing that helped her and her ex focus on what was really important.
The couple decided to hire a mediator to help them come to terms in their child custody agreement and another mediator to help with the financial end of the divorce. The child mediator was able to help the couple work out an agreement in terms of custody, but he also helped the couple by coaching them on some of the best practices with the divorce and children. This included such things having the parents cycle out of the family home so the children had time to adjust to the news of the divorce. A one-bedroom apartment close to the family home was found. Each parent would have time with the children while the other one stayed in the apartment.
Two months after the kids learned of the divorce, the move out of the home was permanent for one parent. Alternating nights with each parent was difficult at first for the children, but the parents felt this was a good arrangement. The parenting plan the couple use today was created during the sessions with the child mediator. They attempted to make sure everything concerning custody was included, such as holidays, vacations and more.
Both parents know that co-parenting is hard, but they have made an effort to remember that the other parent loves the children just as much as he or she does. When the well-being of the children is put at the forefront, the results can be very positive.
Source: Huffington Post, “Separating Kids and Finances: The Parenting Plan,” Jane Ryan, May 05, 2016