Getting a divorce usually leads to one of the parents gaining custody in New York. If you share custody, called joint custody, there are some things you can do to make the journey easier for you, your kids and even your ex-spouse.

Getting your kids raised well is the idea behind this joint custody arrangement. It will be difficult; there is no easy way to say that. However, what relationship is easy? Keeping it all in perspective is important.

Try as hard as you can to simply be friendly. Whether you are at a sporting event, a graduation, a school play or a birthday party that your ex-spouse attends, put your happy face on and just be nice. This will make things so much easier for everyone and puts your ex on notice to do the same thing.

Being thankful can go a long way to making your relationship easier with your ex-spouse. Using the good manners that you try to instill in your kids is one way to be able to smooth over any rough spots that may come your way otherwise. Verbally or by text, use the word “thank-you” with your ex.

Being respectful enough to text, email or say over the phone that you have received the information they sent and are acknowledging this reception will definitely go a long way to getting a better relationship with the other parent of your child. Usually, they will follow your lead and keep it cordial.

Be careful to avoid the temptation of keeping information from your ex-spouse. If there is a new sitter or person taking care of your children, tell your ex. He or she really needs to know that you aren’t going behind his or her back and hiring a sitter who wouldn’t be welcome to do the job in his or her mindset.

Are you contemplating a divorce or are in the middle of a custody fight with your ex? You may want to contact a legal professional who will keep your best interests in mind.

Source: The Huffington Post, “Five Seemingly Simple Tips for Fostering a (Sometimes) Positive Co-Parenting Relationship” Leah Porritt, Mar. 13, 2015